Always, what receives returns.
Son, though you know it not, soon a great peace will befall your searching soul. A realisation you will not recall as one event but as having occurred in fragments over a duration, dotted yet of many pangs to come along the approach. The days of life are many more, and you will not grow old ascending always your mountains but I promise, you are surely being prepared to receive the love you cannot find, and a most heavenly glade you will someday simply happen into, finding there an everlasting contentment with all the pains that have passed and blessings most brief that braid every lifetime. A place to which there are no directions, where the summits shadow does not access and we are all here waiting. You must have faith you are coming home all along.