Strength takes planning.
Like many such days designed and pressed with expectation, I relent rather to dormancy’s caramel tenure, that calculation has exhausted the hands would earn their bread. And it is not before the sheer that I bend; I reserve no energy for homecomings, and storm or mountain perchance be-damned if we but departed forthwith. I’m intent and flint as any have I known, but struck in aim and vernal outrage, many of the bridges from which I’ve leapt are ashes now. Mark how my wake bears charring of my passage, that life must wrung of its barbarian dreams be, and they, hitched and ridden across the arches of infinitude among such star stuff as hero’s call home, and the dying, paradise. It is not the errand itself, but the preparation that, too long drawn out, wanes the breath of that dividing lunge and kills the dashing in me. Momentous endeavours of great risk and dividend require oddly proportioned drafts of growth stratagem, and a vein of personal patience like exhibits a column saint. The better influence of discretion swells but when the sum of necessary efforts, by their own are a metric, and the cannons thus are cold that cannot a smoking wick inspire them. I have often too, fatigued myself thinking long beyond a common bound of hopes fantastical, only to climb down off my Nebula and let the air out of the day, – deflate its glorious promise, and murder all my plans and prospects thoroughly.
Your sufferings and repletions in life do not happen to you, but by response in kind to the energy you extend; there should no astonishment be.
Know, I am at a severest junction. Some silent upheaval my chest inherits, by mandate of the stars begins its pretty confusion and stalls in double-examined thought the rigid course. For all my scheduling is left to the mockery of plotted gales which congenially nudge me forth stranger fields.
Correction such suffering employs, its glorious mutiny to administer, and to thee dear reader, by private conflict racked, I plead; though courage startled flees, bear it out. Rail not the current for the pond, but recline upon the streams, and adrift, carried calmly be to oceans vaster than can dreaming measure. If your sweet heart should be broken upon the brooks, it is only to loose the whole of its remarkable contents. May you then take flight.